Broken Trust

My boyfriends brother

I don’t understand. I want to but I don’t. I can’t grasp any of it. I still kept on asking myself why since I knew. What he did is just pure selfishness for me. The girl don’t deserve any of that. Not a little. Not a single bit.

After all the courting, if there’s one.
After all the efforts, the love, the memories.
After all the sacrifices, the giving, the taking, and the time spent.
After everything, he left her just like that.

Because of youth?
Because of the time not given or the time lost?
Because of priorities?
Because of whatever self centered reason.
I cannot judge. I want to but I can’t. I know nothing.

Maybe he end it because it’s for the best?
Maybe he did it because he felt it’s not right anymore?
Maybe he left because that’s the right thing to do?
Maybe it’s all for her?

But heck when I saw his chats flirting with another girl after the break up?
I felt pity for his ex.
Damn those montesclaros!
Damn those girls with captivating looks.
Damn those boys who are easily snatched.
Damn those girls who knows no boundaries.

Maybe it’s fine because it’s over.
Maybe they could blossom the love that they have felt a year ago?
Maybe they could rekindle the fire that they almost have when they were in someones arms?
Maybe it’s fine. But is it wrong that I felt betrayed?

Is it because it is really wrong? Or was it because of the pain in the past.

I have never been loved at the beginning to be honest.
One of the montesclaros, the older sister has my boyfriends heart.
He kept on denying it, but I felt it.
Until such time I found out the truth. I found out that he loved her but saw her as out of his league.

It’s like a scar that opened after all the years.
Maybe it’s not about his brother.
Maybe it’s not about the girlfriend.
Maybe it’s not about the montesclaros.
Maybe it’s because of the dishonesty that hurts me so much that still made me cry and doubt his love until now.
Maybe it’s the pain of the broken trust.


credits photo:


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