Broken Infinity

I once told you that if your love fade away, it’s okay.

If I won’t be enough anymore, it’s fine.

If you find your happiness with someone else, it’s alright.

I will be okay, fine, and alright.

You cried that night because you can’t imagine happening it to us.

I somehow knew this would happen.

I somehow knew that a person like me can’t be loved forever, or a lifetime rather.

That’s why I always remind you that I’ll be okay, fine and alright and I mean it.

I really do.

You vowed tho, thinking I’m just paranoid.

You promised that you will stay beside me.

“Grow old with me”

Such lovely words.

Somehow my destiny find it’s way to us.

We grew apart.

You forget your vow.

Unfortunately, I forgot what I know is destined.

I questioned you a lot.



and why.

All along I knew.

I just forgot or maybe I chose to.

I believed you- that you’ll stay with me.

Then the right time came.

A fate destined to happen.

It’s okay.

It’s fine.

It’s alright.

I know it is not okay.

It will never be fine.

I will never be alright.

But I’m happy tho, even for such little time.

You made me believe how an infinity felt like.

Too bad what we had is a broken one.


Another update for this Valentine’s day! Please do read the second one titled “But me”.. I really thank you for taking the time in reading my post. Hope all of you enjoyed it. Trulalallalalal fuun fuuun fuuun.

Ps. I chose dango🍡 border because it reminds me of the person I’m dedicating this poetry to.

Credits to photo:,online_chips:created,online_chips:feather&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjGlZfh2KXZAhUIhbwKHfNID00Q4lYINygA&biw=360&bih=566&dpr=2


🔴But Me🔴

Should I fight for it?

Do you think I should fight for it?

My love?

My right to stop them?

Should I do it?

Can I?

Should I?

I love him.

I respect her.

I love him.

I respect her.

Should I do it?

Stop them?

He loves her.

She loves him.

He loves her.

She loves him.

Should I still do it?

Can I?

Should I?

Even if it hurts them.

Even if it hurts him.

Should I?

Can I?

I think I shouldn’t tho.

But can I?

Or no.

Maybe I should be happy.

Maybe I should stop.

Maybe I can let them be.

Maybe it should me hurting.

Not them.

Not her.

Not him.

But me.



It’s not that long, and I know some of you can’t relate but I still do hope that all of you enjoyed it. Soon I will be posting other stuff than this. That’s a promise guys! So let’s stop here for noooow! Trualalalalallalala fun fuun fuuuunaaartache😉💔

Credits to photo:

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What do I have to give to be loved?
I don’t have the looks.
I dont have the talent.
I dont have the brain.
I don’t even had the figure.
What do I have to give to be loved?
Is my love not enough?
Is my care not enough?
Is my time not enough?
Is my sacrifices not enough?
What do I have to give to be loved?
Is my pride not enough?
Is my loyalty not enough?
Is my selfless love not enough?
Is my soul not enough?
Is my entirety not enough?
What do I have to give to be loved?
If you want me to be beautiful outside, just say so. I would willingly change my appearance for you.
If you want me to have a perfect figure, just say so. I would starve and work out to death for you.
If you want me to have the brains to compete to you, just say so. I would read books every minute, every second to get me where you want.
If you want me to be talented, just say so. I would go to different lesson in everyday to know how to sing and dance and whatever you want.
If only you would say a thing to me.
But instead you blame yourself for not being enough and left me.
You said it’s for my sake.
Then tell me why?
Why do you look so happy?
Then here I am, dying – with a heartbreak no words could explain the pain.
Why can’t you tell me straight to my face.
Cause baby if you tell me you left because you see yourself not enough for me then I will tell you that you are and if it ain’t true – well I don’t care.
Now please tell me.
Tell me the truth.
Tell me you don’t love me.
Tell me you don’t need me.
Tell me you don’t see me enough to stay.
Tell me so that I will know.
Tell me so that I can go.
Tell me and I’ll let you go.


Hi guys! It’s Jo again. How are you doin? Thank yoi for taking the time in reading this nonstop drama poetry/story/i dont know what it is post😂 Hope you really enjoyed it! Please do follow and like this post too(and my other post/and comment about anything related to me od the post) for more updates! So bye for now, trulalalallala fun fun fuuuuun😁😁😁

Credits to the photo:

Because it’s me?

My boyfriend once told me that he will always be there. He promised. And I believed it. I hold on to it.
He loved me so much that he is willing to give up his friends. I loved him. He made me feel perfectly pretty and loved. He became my everything. I never received such love. A love that you don’t have to prove yourself. A love that no matter who you are, what you are, and what you will be – you are assured that you will always be and always will be loved. Maybe I did something wrong, I dont know really but he changed. One time he get angry just for a game and even though I know it would hurt me, he hated me. One time he get annoyed at me for putting make up, I thought it would be a good stategy to bring his eyes on me again but instead he told me that I don’t look beautiful with it – I wished he knew I was doing it for him. One time I asked him what great things he sees in me, and he answered doing crafts and stuff, I dont know if I should be happy or not cause that’s the only thing he answered despite everything I sacrificed for him. I’m not counting or anything, it’s just when we talked about this friend of his, a girl, he can say a lot of things. She is pretty, keen, witty and so much more. I wonder if crafts is the only thing he sees in me? I love him. I really do.
You know, it’s hard to find love or a person rather. Why is it so?
Is it that hard to love and commit to someone? Or is it hard because it’s me. If I got the looks? Do I deserve the love I’m looking for? If I got the brains and everything? Can I have the love I’m looking for?
Love is so free yet so hard to find.
Sometimes I wonder, Is it that hard to love? Or is it hard because it’s me?


Hi guys! Another post for this day. Sorry for not keeping up tho. Hope you can relate to what I wrote. I still don’t have the answers if someone ask me if it’s because of them (insert about the matter). But for now, if you just can’t find the answers, and you don’t have anyone to talk to. It’s better to sit down and pray. He’ll listen. And besides, according to the bible, he loves us soo much. We keep looking anywhere for love and yet we don’t see that up there, someone is wayching us and loving us sooo much. Maybe it’s time to look up and let’s see what happens after.😊😊😊

So this ends here! Trulalalalalala Fun fun fuuun always readers!! bye for now😊

Credits for picture:….0…

PS: Please follow me for more updates guys!😊💕

I’m sorry💛

It’s almost four in the morning. My lights are still on.

I decide to look at some photos while reminding myself that I’m okay.

That you love me.

That no matter what it will always be me. That you will always choose me.

I am afraid you see.

I am terrified in everything about her.

She is fascinating.

Very witty. Gorgeous even.

Sexy and hot.

And even just for that second, she has been in your heart.

You loved her.

You adore her.

You look at her the way you never looked ate me.

I fear you see.

I don’t want you taken away.

I tried to give my love and it’s not enough.

I tried giving my soul and still not enough.

I tried giving myself and for that little while, you looked at me for a second.

A second full of love and adoration as if your eyes are saying ” I love you “.

But it seems not enough to feul everything fo us to keep going.

Again and again.

Never enough.

Will never be enough.

So I broke us up. I thought maybe I could do it.

Maybe I could soar those skies again without you.

Maybe I could run freely with that happy face I portray when I’m with you.

But darling you see.

I remembered I was never happy until I met you.

I never smiled like the smile when I’m beside you.

You see baby, you are my happiness.

Yet still I took the risk and destroy us.

I destroyed me.

Now here I am, waiting for you to come back to me.

Save me again like you did before.

Help me again from this waters I’m drownin’ for.

Love me and take me from my grave.

Please go back cause you know I need you babe.

Please go home or it’ll be too late. You might not see me living but in bed, ending my fate.

Hurry now my love, run back to me as fast as you can.

But if you’re tired and don’t want to, I completely understand.

And for the last time I want to say sorry.

For pushing you so much.

For being that the reason that you already had enough.

I’m sorry for making you cry and for hurting you so much.

I’m sorry that I am scared.

I’m sorry that I don’t want you shared.

I’m sorry for being in your life.

I’m sorry for appearing then now leave you behind.

I’m sorry I can’t do it without you.

I’m sorry I’m tired.

But please be so happy and forget who I am.

I’m sorry…


Another trulalalaartache for you guys! Hope you enjoy😊

Credits for photo:

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The girl you unknowingly fell in love with.

Red balloons.
Skinny jeans and black shirt.
A pair of grayish sneakers with blue ties – that’s her.
Long black hair, as black as the watch in her wrist. It is so plain yet very beautiful to you.

I wonder sometimes, if I would be as pretty, as clever, or be like her, would you pick me? if only I came earlier? will it be me?

It’s still painful that I wish to just numb up and forget everything, no! forget my everything. Forget about you.


This hurt as trulalalalalala😅

Credits for the photo: Giphy

Pleae don’t forget to follow for more updates about how heart breaking this is for me. Hope ya’ll readers could relate😅 We’re all in this together🎶🎶🎶

The unpost post📜

I have said a lot of bad things behind your back. Each in everytime we fight. Terrible words came out from my mouth, words that should have been remained unsaid. To everyone who knew him by my stories, by my poetry, by my tears and anger, My boyfriend Josh loves me and truly cares for me. One time I told this girl about our story, and I started at the point of where he broke me. That was wrong people. I am wrong. I should have said, “He is the most caring, he is the most kindest, and he is the most loving person I have ever known”. He never gave me a bouquet of flowers, but he has given me a bouquet of my daily needs(may it be a facial wash, a soap, a food, or a money). And yes he is mostly late picking me up. People asked how can I stand it? Sometimes I answered love and sometimes I don’t know. But friends the truth is; he always make it up for me. And he never failed doing so. He may have other girl friends but for him I am not just a friend but his princess (not queen cause that’s for her mom) and yet I still complain. He is not selfish, I am. We got into a fight and people pity me because I’m crying. But none of you knew that he did too because I only cared for myself and wanted all of you to feel sorry for me and feel disgusted to him. Josh is a good man and a good boyfriend. He treasures every people in his life as if they are about to leave soon. And while here I am taking all the credit as the best girl of the year (which I’m not), he is taking all the bad stuff for me. So to the girl whom I trusted so much and spread how awful josh is to me, I am not mad because it’s solely my fault. I never told you how wonderful and blessed I am to have Josh in my life. I never told you how special I felt whenever I’m around him. I never told you how his eyes look at me as if I’m the most beautiful girl in the world. He is not perfect but so are we. And to those people who feels sorry for me because I have Josh as my man. Please don’t. Because having him means countless laughter and joy to me. And I am so glad that despite the bad things I have said and done, he still chose to love me and stay with me. He wanted me to stay quiet about everything, but no. He don’t deserve those hurtful words, I do. So to our friends. This is the truth. We broke up, not because he is selfish or anything but because we grew apart. We are now starting again as friends and with the guidance of the Lord, we are now moving on.


I love him so much but it’s too late now. He don’t need me as his girl anymore. And I don’t deserve to be that either. I just broke his heart after all he has done for me. If only I could say sorry one more time and make him realize how I regret not doing everything for him and show him that I really love him. You’ll never know until it’s too late they say. and it’s true. A bit of advice. If you have a problem with each other. Talk. Don’t tell other people. And do everything for that person. Don’t listen to all your friends acting so high and say you deserve better. Because in reality, you are not even better and still he/she chose you. Don’t act as if you’re a royalty or something because no one is!, even legit prince/princesses. So love them! hug all their flaws. Don’t give up on them cause there will be a day they will bloom and you will be happy to see such beautiful thing happening, unfolding, just in front of your eyes, a beautiful butterfly. A butterfly who truly loves you, adore you, and thankful because you waited. You waited for them to be completely what you are looking for (in agood way of course, and their own will).

So thats it for now! Trulaalalalla

Credits for photo:

Where are they?

It’s amazing how I get to have the chance to meet a lot of wonderful and good people that left such impact in my life, that despite my incapabilities to socialize and communicate well enough to be understood, they tried to befriend me and spend time with me.
It saddens me that as seasons passed by I came up with the realization that they are all gone leaving me an untruthful promise. A vow uttered by their own lips and sewed by their own tongue – that they will always stay -they will always stay. Those words taught me to completely demolished the bricks that I myself built from all the years of suffering and experiences. I trusted those word.. I trusted them. But where are they?

Credits to the owner of the picture:


Dear my beloved followers and readers I’m deeply sorry for not updating for a while. I’ve been into so much stuff. I do hope you still continue to read and follow me despite my lack of keeping you. I can’t say trulalalala fun fun fun right now cause I’m still at my worst so please bear with me with this random poetry (or rant) I wrote. Hopefully I’ll be updating another post soon.

For more info:

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​Hello people!
Today’s journey is about people who are suffering from depression. Having this kind of mental illness is very hard, no mental illness is that easy to cope up. If it’s compared to a body disease – its like cancer. It can kill you slowly and slowly and when you knew, it’s too late. That’s why it’s very important for us to have our mental health check from day to day. And also be sensitive to all the poeple around us. They maybe our parents, children, friends, classmates,workmates, or someone we cherish, or just someone we are acquainted to. They might be suffering from depression and fighting it alone, please here me. THEY NEED US. They need constant reminder that they are treasures and important. They need to know there is someone who cares for them, loving them, and depending on them. They need to know that they are not alone on what they are fighting at. They need to know that their life is just as important as to anyone they knew or look up to. And most especially they have to know that some time from now, everything will be alright. Everything will be perfect again.
So I dedicate this post for all who are suffering in depression.
Below is a video for you folks! (please press the link) It’s entitled “The girl behind the mask”

And please be reminded that we love you and everything’s gonna be fine soon, that’s a promise😊

The Girl Behind The Mask The Girl Behind the Mask doesn’t understand that beauty, is in the eye of the beholder, and it doesn’t matter how many times that I’ve told her, she still relies on the opinions of people of who don’t realise, that what they see as shy is in fact the feeling of lonely, they feeling of whatever she does is not quite good enough, the feeling of constantly disappointing the people closest who only want to see her happy. But instead they have to watch the deterioration and can do nothing, can do nothing but hope and pray that one day the Girl Behind the Mask can finally say, with content and honesty to herself… I’m happy. I can put these feelings of no self-worth on the shelf and live on and build up my life and repair myself from the past, and can finally say to myself that at last, I’ve done it. I’ve beaten the demons inside my soul, the demons who did nothing but make my thoughts and my life cold. The ones who made me contemplate my life, my confidence, my existence and my future, made me feel hurt that can’t be fixed with a surgical suture. The ones who made me panic when I even left my room as if the world was out to get me as if one day soon my day will come. When I can’t take anymore, the burden of depression has left me too sore, there’s no other option, no other way, it’s time… time to give my life away. The Girl Behind the Mask doesn’t see, that her strength shines so much brighter, you see, the Girl Behind the Mask doesn’t know what she’s capable of, it’s as if she’s blind to how happy she makes everyone, puts a smile on the face of a person feeling down, she’s blind to the fact that she can turn a sad day around, and make people smile from ear to ear, but when she takes off the mask she’s filled with nothing but fear, fear of what the next day is going to be for her, as if she’s waiting for her sentence and there’s nothing but rumours being spread about her. The Girl Behind the Mask’s the definition of beauty, the meaning of strength, she needs to know that it’s the duty, of everyone who cares to help in the fight, to make her realise that her life is her life, to understand that there’s nothing to be afraid of, she has family and friends that will show depression what they’re made of. The Girl Behind the Mask needs to lift her head up and open her eyes and realise that she’ll never be alone and as much as she may feel it, the pain she’s feeling now… happiness will heal it. So be strong and proud of the person you are, because with strength and power the end of these feelings isn’t far. And you can smile, sing, dance around and live the life you’ve been deprived of, the life you haven’t felt, the live you’ve lived contemplating an overdose or a belt. The life you’ve lived where eating is made a living hell, the life you’ve lived where everything goes wrong, but I promise that one day you can sing the song of courage and bravery, and you’ll be free from the emotional pain of mental anxiety. Stand with me now, Girl Behind the Mask, listen to these words, to yourself you must ask, why am I letting this take over and look in the mirror and witness your beauty, and as hard as it seems you need to smile, it’s your duty. And then see your pain as an emotional journey, a bumpy ride but as long as it seems, remember that certainly, there’ll be a destination waiting for you where you can be happy at last, but please be strong, Girl Behind the Mask.

Credits: Video _ Iwan Bedford
Picture_ Pinterest(dont know who.                 really uploaded the picture, if you.                 know something please comment.                 below.)
If you want to donate for mental health charity and help those who suffer in mental illness please press the link the arrow is pointing:


A quick reminder for those who are feeling depress, please seek help by having a mental health check up. You can’t fight this alone, you need help. Don’t be afraid, it will all be alright.
That’s all for now! Hope you learned something. Bye.😊

Trulalalalalalala fun fun fun💗💗💗

I’M FINE. I’ll be fine.

Hi guys!
Today I’m sharing you a piece of my story. Today this post will be no fun at all. Today I wanna show you that it’s okay not to be okay. 
I’m jo. I’m a psychology student. It’s embarassing to be like this actually. It’s a shame that I study a lot of people’s personality and abnormalities that I’ve been blinded to see mine.
I never knew I’d be like this. Such a disappointment and disgrace.
My parents thought I’m still studying as a Physical Therapist never they know that I’m studying psychology now. I want to tell them. I want to tell them all the things I learned. But here I am, keeping it to myself for the fear that they won’t accept the truth.
I’m being eaten by my  conscience, hurt, guilt and anger.
I fake smile every single day. Maybe I have depression? I dont know. I can assess myself but I tend not to. I’m afraid that I am not wrong.
I cant even remember how it feels like to be truly happy. It seems I already forgot…

But it’s okay to be like this. I always remind myself that soon, everything will pass away. Everything will come to it’s end. And until that day is still coming, I will be waiting here standing tall and building walls around me.

So when the right time comes, where my problems bow down to me. I will crush it with all the walls I used to build and finish it up.


This is the end folks! Till next time!..
Trulalalala… May you have fun fun fun fun👋👋👋
credits to (I use it’s art for a somewhat exact portrait of my emotions right now) :

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